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From Within the Asylum

It wasn’t an ice-cream induced coma that caused my week-lapse in blogging. It was more, I had six pints of Phish Food, I really didn’t need anything else in life. But alas, all good things do come to an end. Unfortunately, my rear end is not one of them, now. Tell me there’s more to life than perfect ice cream.

We are eagerly entering round #2 of the chicken pox. You’re sick of hearing about chicken pox? Tell me about it.

Benja broke out yesterday. He calls the Benadryl I give him his “chicka-chicka boom-boom medicine”. Today I gave him a dosage just before I shoved him into a dark corner to take a nap. As I poured the clear bubble-gum flavored liquid onto a teaspoon he stated, “I’m in luck!” Tell me that’s not a good-natured boy.

He’s having a more rough go of it, he seems to have more pox on him and of course he is inclined to scratch them.
I am trying to get him to tell me when one itches so I can put cream on it. After a morning of reminding him “Don’t scratch, tell me when it itches!” we had an after noon of “oh my knee, my knee—hurry! Ahhh my butt, ohhhhh my awm, quick, hurry!” Those scenes altogether were not for suitable for general audiences.

Since my kids have become accustomed to only each other, and periodically me, for friendship, they have become quite the pals. Only a few times a day will Avee grab, pinch, poke, knock over, or otherwise agitate Benja only to run from the room screaming with glee. All the girl wants is a good chase through the house. So naturally, only a few more times than that will Benja demonstrate (loudly) his firm grasp on the if/then consequences he’s so aptly learned from my superb parenting techniques and yell, “If you do that again Avee, I will poke your eye out. Both of your eyes!” I promise I have never threatened to poke out both eyes. Ever.

I’ve captured some candid shots in the last couple of days that just melt my heart, and so I’m going to post them. If they don’t melt your hearts, you have a heart as cold as Phish Food kept on Dry Ice from DC to Texas. That’s all I have to say about that.

Oh yeah, one of the non-melting pictures is just the progression of Ben’s unsightly fpots in less than 24 hours. We still coo’ if it doesn’t melt your heart.

I came out of another room to find them hanging out together like this.
This is Ben yesterday before the spots showed up.

Before you call CPS you should know, we only let them play in the dryer AFTER they've finished playing in the kitty litter and have returned the keys to our car. If you are thinking Avee has an abnormally elongated torso and shortly legs, well, it's not abnormal, it's actual. And she'll thank me and my genetic contribution when she is 16 and 5'11 and doesn't have to shop at Monstrous Inseams R Us just to avoid the "I even wear capris in the winter" or the "yeah, so what if I'm waiting for a flood" look.


And then came the pox.

This was lunchtime today.

As unsightly as a smiling leper may appear, it was nigh impossible to get him to NOT "smile".

I'm not sure if pictures capture how incredibly adorable this was to me. Avee is giving herself five. After they were done in the dryer, I closed the door and Avee "helped" me. As I praised her for her help, she began to give herself five. J often gives the kids "five" as his form of praise and they really dig it. She was just fillin' in for him. Since he has to go to work and all.


And that stuff they say about sleeping "babies". It's true. I just wanted to eat him up, all mismatched in his 2t firetruck pajama top and 4t fpido-man boxers, snuggling with 4 miniature monkeys, curled up like a little baby, covered in chicken pox. I can hardly believe my life was complete before I saw this.

awwwww.... his fpots totally melt my heart. What a cutie.

I'm totally calling CPS on you right now, drawing spots on your children to garner blogger sympathy. Good grief, woman, is there NOTHING you won't stoop to?

Hubby has the same body type, as do several of the babies. I think our legs are the same length and he's a foot taller.

The giving herself five is PRECIOUS... (and that starts with P and that rhymes with T and that stands for Trouble. He, he, he.)

You are funny...the butt without end. But no inseams without end. Which is good.

Me and Les had pox at the same ages as B and A - She had nineteen, total, and I had them on top of each other, inside my nose and ears, EVERYWHERE, and a fever that made me delirious and had to spend a night in the hospital...I don't specifically remember it, but I've heard stories enough of it that I am scared of the pox. But haven't done the vaccine...

I don't envy your month-long cycle of sharing the spots. But their little "friendship" is adorable.

Avery giving herself 5 is ADORABLE! And I love the picture of them in the dryer :-)

Hope those fpecks come of soon Benja!

My heart is officially in a puddle on the floor. Those pictures of them together are SO CUTE. I really like the ones with the rain gear, too. Good luck with the pox. That's got to be getting annoying by now. Good thing Benja is so sweet about it.

I am with TMM- spot check for more ice cream? You just might need a twelve step program or the bishop for this ice cream "issue". Six pints is plenty! Those two babies are the cuties things ever... (well atleast for nine more weeks) and the dryer pic with kitty litter all over them was priceless. Did avee fix the litebulb in the dryer? I have atleast 100 pics of J sleeping- it made my heart melt everytime.

I just want the general public to know that my J is different then DWR's J:) I feel better with that clarification after my previous comments. My J is also very HOT but only 12.

Millie--are you just being nice? I find the fpots quite unattractive. At the drive-thru pharmacy today (for MY antibiotics) I had Ben hang out the window and wag his tongue to garner sympathy and get faster service. Didn't work. Apparently his kind is common at Wal-shart.

CYM--I'm glad the cuteness of Avee's high five was conveyed. J who I thought would love it barely responded. My ice cream broke up this month long cycle wonderfully. And, if you had told me that pox story before my kids broke out, I would have been scared. I'm glad they are getting them "naturally" and getting it behind them---they have fared well.

Earthbint--I think you are adorable. Won't you come play in my dryer?

Camille---ohhhh, thanks. They reduce my heart to puddles regularly when the "play" together. There's nothing sweeter.

S--Mom says Little K's gonna have Big L's 'darling round head'. That cracks me up.
Your J is hot. Mine's legal.

Epsi---your astuteness cracked me up! Those are Neptunes. The nicest things we own. We bought them in our post-college-graduate euphoria and spent the next year making up for it. However RC Willey did give us that year interest free....we just didn't know we'd need it.
Crazy Aunt. Did I say that out loud?

Wal-Fart is used to having people with open weeping sores walk in. It's equal opportunity, you know.

"There's no discrimination in the manure business." (Guess the quote)

:( Where did my comment go?
Was it something I said, Blogger didn't like it or is my picture that horrible?

NCS--no comment was sent to my email or posted. Please leave another one. I live for your comments. No pressure.
But I ain't gonna lie, your picture is homely...:)

It’s ok, blogger ate it up.
Unfortunately that comment was the wittiest, funniest, exciting comment I have ever written, alas, now no one will ever read it.

It was something about how your super cute kids melted my heart all over my desk, about how I love fpido-man, how I laughed at Avee high-fiving herself, and how lucky you are of taking all those cute pictures.

:D Ta-da

Those pics are priceless. Nothing tugs at my heartstrings more than pics of poor sickly little children. Haddie was super sick a while ago with RSV and she looked downright miserable!

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