Dancing Without Rhythm

How much could one person have to say when she spends her days loitering around a hotel. Well, whatever---it's my blog. :)

Mostly I just want to document a few things, as we all know how fleeting things can be with small children. Avery talks all the time and a few of the things she says need to be recorded because she passes through her phrases and her speech impediments too quickly.

Yesterday Jay said to her, "Just a minute, it's hot!" and she replied very subdued, "oookaaaaaaaaay" and has been doing that all day in response to my "Hang on's, just a minute's, not right now's" It's totally appropriate and I wonder how much she knows that.

She also likes to rush to the hotel door to let herself out before the rest of us anytime we are headed that way. It's always locked. And she immediately informs us. Only, she hasn't quite mastered the word "locked". So every time she sounds like she's dropping the f-bomb. Which I find entirely hilarious. "Oh man, we're f-ed" she says. I tell her to go open the door regularly, just for the entertainment. "Me tan't, we're f-ed!" It reminds me of Everett on "O Brother Where Art Thou" when they are trapped in the upper part of the barn. "damn, we're in a tight spot" over and over. Yeah, good comedy.

We have Nick Jr on constantly here. Ben's in heaven. He looooooooooves Wonder Pets which seriously baffles me. It's probably the most low budget kids show I have ever seen in my life. But, to be fair, I haven't really ever watched it, just heard it. I just hear him bellowing, "What's gonna wohk, TEAM WOHK" and I am amazed at how he already knows all the words to everything they say on that show routinely.

Anyway, like, 52 years ago I turned off "Lazy Town" once, back when we had cable in our home. Something about that show really bugs me---particularly the villain. I'm not sure what it is---but I really do dislike it. Enough to put up with his contesting loudly when I put it off. Apparently this made a lasting impression. I've overheard him telling at least half a dozen people that I don't like Lazy Town. And now, since he sees commercials for it while indulging in his 6 hour marathon of tv watching, he comments on it ALL the time. "So, is it that skinny guy that you don't like on Lazy Town?" As a rule, I don't like skinny guys. Or, "Those people right there are why you don't like Lazy Town, huh mom?" There really isn't a cute punch line to this story, but it has really amazed me at how much it matters to him that I don't like this show and why.

Tonight at dinner he did ask Jay if he liked Lazy Town. Jay thought he was talking about me and told him "Don't call your mom lazy, and it's a house, not a town." Just kidding, but when Jay said he hadn't ever seen it, Ben responded, "Well, I've seen two episodes." Excuse me? What three year old uses the word "episodes" in conversation? Probably one who's mother watches too many episodes of tv. Or has episodes herself. Either one.

Just now I read a book to Ben and on one of the pages was a picture of the Humpty Dumpty character. He started reciting the nursery rhyme word for word and I just looked at him filled with pride. I'm not so great with reciting nursery rhymes or regular nursery songs with my kids. I just forget to and stuff. Plus, that's what church and preschool are for, right? Well, I know I have only said Humpty Dumpty to him maybe twice. Maybe. I am just amazed with his memory. I look on at him proudly and he finished, "...couldn't put Humpty together again...but Dora can!" So, now that I know he learned it from Dora, I know now that he's probably heard it 732 times and half of those yelled at the top of her sweet little lungs. So what, he still has a good memory.

I've been trying to get Avery to say Ben for a long time. Pretty much since she started saying anything. She never would. Until today. And it's "Bean" and she says it sort of patronizingly, like she's the adult and he's the 2 year old who still has no problem walking around with his own excrement smooshed in his pants until someone stops blogging and catches her him. And sometimes it's "Baby Bean" which I quickly got Benjamin to laugh at the first time so as to keep him from knocking her block off.

And last but not least---well, yeah, it's least. If you haven't seen the Alannis Morisett spoof on the totally crass song "Humps", you should. It's hilarious. But not you mom, you shouldn't watch it. And you should also know, I would never watch or listen to anything like that. Ever. Let alone promote it on my blog.

Posted by Angela on Wednesday, April 04, 2007 at 4/04/2007 | Permalink