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Funny

As a child, in my home, being funny was the prize to be won. Being the funniest was the ultimate goal. There are some VERY funny people in my family. It wasn't until I was in my early 20's that I realized we got every ounce of our "Smith Humor" from my mother. My dad can't even tell a scripted joke to save his soul. And sometimes he'll try a pun and laugh and laugh before he can say it and when he does, you wish desperately that you could have gone the rest of your life never hearing it, it's so bad. One of the funniest things my brothers have done, is imitate my father telling a joke. Now, THAT'S funny. My mom was my mom. She wasn't funny. She was the one who told us to get to bed, do our homework, take out the trash, not go out of the house in dirty underwear, no one likes an know-it-all, etc. It wasn't in her job description to be funny. So, I never noticed.

Well, a couple of days ago my friend Epsi sent me an email that made me laugh heartily. Of course, I immediately forwarded it to a dozen more people, as though I were the creative genius behind it.

The email read: ATTENTION: ALIENS ARE COMING TO ABDUCT ALL THE GOOD LOOKING AND SEXY PEOPLE. YOU WILL BE SAFE; I'M JUST EMAILING TO SAY GOODBYE.

The responses I have gotten have all made me laugh. My sister simply wrote, "I beg to differ" and added three pictures of herself, which had obviously JUST been taken outside her house with the digital camera. She's posing sexily in front of a tree, accessorizing with a scarf. They were funny, but they were TWICE as funny because she is VERY pregnant and clearly having trouble with the more seductive leg bend and back tilts. But that certainly didn't stop her from trying.

Other responses I got:

Thank you for the warning. I will greatly miss your good looking and sexy self.

Not only are you dang good looking....but humble!

AAAAHHHHH!...oh wait, only the sexy people? yep, I'm safe.

Is this before or after your Oregon trip? Thank you for thinking of me, you will be missed. Good luck, I hear the anal probes are a beast.

And then my mother. She's 71. Shouldn't she have a diminished capacity by now? Of any kind? I mean, she can still peel and chop a carrot faster than I can do the same with a cuisanart. She can whip through 17 loads of laundry in one day and make it look like she barely handwashed some delicates and hung them to dry. She can find anything you need at any time for any purpose. Usually in her purse or tied to a string in her kitchen. She can make a pair of SAS shoes, hot pink pants, hot pink turtle neck with purple cardigan, and 3 chained eyeglasses around her neck look way cuter than I could ever try to be in my finest clothes and accessories. *Sigh* Above all, she's still the cleverest of them all.

Her response to my email:
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN: THIS E-MAIL WAS UNDELIVERABLE. THE RECEIPIENT IS EVIDENTLY NO LONGER ON THIS PLANET. SORRY (YOU'RE LATE----ABDUCTIONS ARE OVER)

I made the mistake of telling my mom on the phone, "Your response took the cake mom." She gloated aloud and then bragged to my sister who was sitting nearby. I heard my sister swear and I knew my mom was in gloaters gloating heaven because she didn't even tsk at her.
But I will. S, watch your mouth. At least you have potential for when you're 71.

Your email took me so by surprise - I can't believe you don't think I'm sexy - that I was floored. Every time I looked at it, I thought, could this be real?

Sorry I didn't answer it. :)

I should know better than to eat while reading your blog.
What were you eating you may ask, good question, I was eating jell-o at the moment, so you can imagine how that went.

So Teh Funnay runs in your family. He he, your mom’s response was definitely the best :D

PS: your Sis is bringing the "sexyback' yo!.

Man that is funny. Tell your mom to send me some funny pills or something b/c I need a major overhaul.

I did love your mom's but I think that the one about the anal probes was edited. I know my wife, and she can be, well, colorful in her language.

Anonymous for Relief Society sake

Your mom is the only grown person I know that I would like to bottle up as much as I would my own children - she is priceless! Super funny.

What a fun family you have! See, this would never work in my family because no one takes teasing well. If I sent that e-mail out, there would be feelings hurt and bad feelings for years about it.

Your mom is a hoot! :)

I just have to say I was a good healthy tie and NOT showing the picture is NOT fair. Another thing, mother has stepped up her humor to a side split laughter conversation several times a day. She is really cranking them out right now. CYM is right she needs to be bottled and NCS don't read on a full bladder either or when the whole house is sleeping.

This brings back traumatic memories of when Morris Day and The Time used to call out to us from their song, "The Bird", that this dance was only for the "SEXY PEOPLE." What? Only for the sexy people? But as a geeky white girl, I only knew how to dance the Bird, and The Hokey Pokey. How could Morris Day discriminate like that?

I like your Mom. She should replace that old bag, Joan Rivers, on the red carpet.

For whenver you read this:
:) <---this is me last night.

You are so totally awesome.
That's all.

For whenever you read this:
:D <---this is me last night, even when you beat me up.

You are super duper awesome.
That's all.

For whenever you read this:

(__Y__) This is me, sitting with you at the restaurant, watching you drool on yourself and cracking up.

I miss you already.

I found your blog from Millie's page. Oh, my, goodness! I haven't laughed so hard in quite a while! I'm definitely coming back.

LOL! The funny competition is hard in your family...

I ran across your blog from my friend at butcherfam.blogspot.com...I laughed so hard in my cubicle I scared some of my officemates. Thanks for the chuckles!

Your mom sounds like a lot of fun! My mom was wickedly clever, too (she passed away in 2004). I always think of what a fabulous blog she could have had!

I found your blog from Millie's page.

That Millie is sure naughty ain't she?. Naughty naughty, bet she got that from the one that goes by CYM.

And I miss you more.
I look like this right now:
:( <-----Me, missing you.

Ha! top that Millie.

Your family is great! I love that they didn't just laugh and forward the joke on, they replied and made it even funnier! Your sister posing by a tree is cracking me up! Your mom is great!

(I read about you a Millie's. I read about you at NCS. I feel like I am stalking you. Sorry!)

I do not like Millie, I do not like CYM, I do not like NCS I do not like them first, I do not like them funnier, I do not like them stealing my sister I do not like them S I am:) Call home I mean me:)

S: I'm just happy you mentioned me last. This tells me you like me a little bit more than the other two :)

I'm not trying to steal your sister, I'm trying to borrow her. Forever.
Which is very different see?

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