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There should be extra credit for posting on vacation

Now is the time for all good women to get off their hind ends, take a shower, and blog about the absolutely blissful vacation she has been on. Well, at least time for me. I have been having an absolutely heavenly time here in rainy Washington. We're hanging out with my brother and his wife and their son.

I discovered a vital bit of truth to vacationing properly, while here. I went two days without showering and read an entire book in that time. I've taken 3 naps, combed my hair once, and eaten insane amounts of delicious food which I have not prepared. The trick is---visit your BROTHER for this kind of vacation. First of all, a sister would never let two days of you not showering go by without saying something. Or lots of somethings. But see, my brother doesn't notice, and my SIL isn't rude enough. That's the trick. The one who would call you on your disgusting vacation habits, is oblivious. And the one who could isn't quite comfortable enough to tell you that you smell and that the unkempt hair and one outfit per three days look isn't becoming. Even on you.

What I need to report on is my time down south. We flew into Portland and stayed at a hotel for two nights. Benja had a blast staying at a hotel. He has a real hard time with the concept of leaving, and someone else renting our room when we leave. He mourned our hotel room in Branson for a good two weeks, when my friend made the mistake of telling him we had to leave so someone else could stay there. You never know what angle is best with a 3 year old, but I guess it's safe to say, sharing of anything, even hotel rooms, isn't the right one.

I got to meet Millie and No Cool Story on Friday night. It was the best night EVER. Okay, my wedding night was a little more fun, but there was a lot more laughing with them (thankfully) and significantly more food spillage. Particularly on my part, I'm not ashamed to say.

They surprised me at the hotel. I live for surprises but I'm always suspicious and constantly scheming of potential surprises (won't it be so cool if J doen't really have to go to New Hampshire and he's actually at the car dealership buying me a Lexus SUV and having it custom painted the color of my eyes and he's going to show up here right after Oprah with some Pho and a bouquet of flowers and a big red bow wrapped around the Lexus....) so I'm rarely fully surprised. (Sorry all you past surprisers---I'm a good actress). I was genuinely surprised.

Here's why. I walked into the hotel, and off to the side, just before the check-in counter is a little library (aka--blogger's fix-room). I SAW little Miss No Cool sitting demurely in a chair reading a magazine or newspaper. Honest to goodness, we made eye contact and neither of us thought we were who we were. I thought she was an exoctic looking French woman (I don't know why French, but I swear, I thought it) and that she seemed to just glance briefly at my hair and delve back into the scintillating issue of "Hotels R Us" that she was reading. I was alone as J unloaded the kids and luggage, so there were no tell-tale signs of who I was. Then, J walked in, Millie (who was out of sight, blogging) heard me say something whiney like, "Jaaaaaaaaaaay, don't put my suitcase on the bottom, you're smashing my makeup, Jaaaaaaaaay..." and Millie came flying around the corner with these great bright eyes and big smile. It took me a millie-second, but I recognized her. She is a bundle of energy, fo' sho. It was so cool to be surprised by them. And they berated me for claiming to be a redhead when I'm not. My entire life I had to deal with all that "what lovely red hair" crap and dumb questions like, "Now where did you get that pretty red hair..." and wonder why they heck people didn't know my hair came from the same place their hair came from. Or didn't come from. So, I endure such misery as a child, become an adult and FINALLY appreciate having something that's just a little different and something people pay good money to imitate and I don't have it anymore. Thppppppp. Dark haired girls are soooooo picky.

Here's what I have to say about those girls. And yes, they ARE both girls. This can never be a given in the anonymous blogging world.

Millie is bright and engaging and talks just like she does on her blog. She's the real deal. She's also one of those people who does a complete disservice to the new-mom world. She makes the mothering of 5 children seem effortless and enjoyable. I'm not saying being a mom isn't enjoyable, but to really make it LOOK enjoyable? That's amazing. I'm sure it helps that she has this hotty husband who is very hands-on (with the kids) and I personally observed him manage 3 kids that were in 5 different areas playing at any given time. There really aren't many men like that in the world. Millie has a nice voice. I'm just trying to paint a picture you won't get from her blog. I usually don't talk about people's voices. When you hear her talk, you want to be her friend. She also can go from one topic to 5 others in a matter of seconds, seamlessly, and keep you fascinated all the while. I'm working on sleep deprivation, time change, and depleted brain cells, so that's a lot of why there was food coming out of my mouth at dinner. She's fascinating and funny. I hope that when I have five kids and have been married as long as her, I will have as pleasant a disposition and as good of a relationship with my spouse as she does. I'm pleasant and adore my spouse, but we're less than half way there...

No Cool Story is a big fat liar. Everything about her is cool. She is kind and I felt immediately comfortable and liked by her. She laughed at my jokes, but not all of them. That means she is discerning. And, sometimes she laughed when I wasn't trying to be funny, and that made her feel like an old friend. She is quiet. But the kind of quiet where, if you label her as such, and only such, you are SO missing out. She says HILARIOUS things. Quietly. I love that kind of humor. And for some really weird reason, I kept hitting her. I don't. know. why. But you know what, she was still nice to me. She'd just say quietly, but emphatically, "Why are you hitting me?" And I'd stare dumbly at her and say, "I don't know." No Cool's comments on my posts about my children always make me feel good. Like, I'm not the only person in the world who thinks what they say is just the cutest thing ever. And she's the same way in real life. She'd hear Benja say things I didn't hear. And really, what's cuter than a lil' Mexi-American quoting a 3 year old who can't say his R's? Not much. I was going to offer to sell No Cool's first name for $538,000, but she upped the ante by giving me her last name and telling me to try and get some more.
Any takers? I have loved No Cool's blog since the first time I read it. She frequently puts movie or tv quotes at the top of a post, which I think is hilarious, and takes a lot of talent. You can't imagine my delight to have MY NAME--MY.OWN.NAME incorporated into one of those quotes. Yeah, I have arrived folks. I have shamelessly linked to Millie and No Cool's posts about meeting me.

Meeting them was such a highlight. I feel like I've known them forever, and I'm glad to finally put faces, names, and real life memories with everything else.

Oh yeah, one more thing I really liked about these two---they are good friends to each other. They get each other. They are quite different from each other, but they work off of each other like they're identical twins. It's really fascinating to watch. No Cool follows the rapid succession of topics that Millie can fire off (the very ones that make me spittle) and Millie hears every little quiet, subtle, and hilarious thing that No Cool says. They're a great pair.

Okay, I've neglected my vacationing duties for far too long. In my defense, I have been multi-tasking. Whilst typing, I have been safeguarding Benja's tennis shoe, full of mah-bows. Or marbles, for you beginners. The duties of motherhood never cease to amuse me.

No Cool and Millie, I'll be back. I promise not to hit or spit.

Happy Thanksgiving Y'all!

I could say I loved this post because you wrote such nice and sweet things about me, and that makes me feel all happy and exotic inside.

But in reality I loved it because of your insights about:
-The "perfect vacation set-up", visit your BROTHER; that totally makes sense!
-The "Don't tell a 3-year old the mysterious inner working of hotels", I weep along with Benja, because your hotel room WAS super fun.
-The "perfect Angela surprise', ok, I wasn’t eating jell-o this time (no room in my fridge), but drinking pineapple juice, and that little visual caught me by surprise.
-The "I was traumatized by red-hair- loving people”, not to worry, I'm sure Avee will avenge you and beat them all for you.
-The "essence of Millie", wow! that's all the stuff I think about her without really thinking it, fascinating. She does have a great voice, a little know secret, when you call my office, it’s Millie’s harmonious and friendly voice that greets you. Yes, she’s that awesome.
-The "NCS is a big FAT liar" stuff. HA!

The way I see it, you were not hitting me, we were bonding.

Happy Thanksgiving!

I'm mourning the hotel room, the NCS and Millie night, the naps, and the loss of your VERY red hair. You had so much of it once, too...

Mostly I am mourning the Bloglines that used to work and tell me when people had new posts. Lucky I came by today, eh? I've been writing about squirrels because I have missed you so much. (You're the wind beneath my blog.)

Hope the rest of your vacay is awesome, but I can't wait till you get your booty back to Texas and your own 'puter. :)

So fun...I'm lucky enough to have know Miss Millie for years, and met Miss NCoolS a couple of months ago. You brought it all back baby. But I had never really thought about Mill's nice voice. She does have a nice voice...and a very infectious giggle.

I'm sorry about your hair, height and hotel room anxiety...to reassure you on one point, Millie and NCoolS make me look tall too.

Oh and lol about the vacation setup, the last time my mil visited she didn't shower until the very last day of a 5 day visit...same thing, her son didn't notice and I was too polite to say anything... :D

Hey if it wasn't for my 7day no shower visit to yo house this summer I wouldn't have made it. VERY refreshing... Thank heavens for the pool:) I am glad to hear that Millie and NCS are the real deal, I was sensing a little phony blogny going on, but thrilled to hear not so much. I am going to suprise you at the airport with ten other family members tonite, so thanks for the flight info:)

::sniffle...wiping eyes::

That was so sweet. I totally wasn't expecting any of that - that was the "perfect Angela surprise". Your "she makes it look effortless and enjoyable" comment made me hee-haw myself out of my chair. Yeah, right. But you were right about Bri - I wouldn't be the mother I am without him as my babies' daddy. ;)

Amen on: "And the one who could isn't quite comfortable enough to tell you that you smell and that the unkempt hair and one outfit per three days look isn't becoming. Even on you."

But I tell you what does look good on you - food flying out of your mouth when you're laughing. I'm just glad you weren't eating a tongue taco at the time.

You need to get your butt back here soon. I don't care if you are great with child.

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